stacyoutloud

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path. ~ Buddha

 

Hello (again) I’m Stacy and I’m a over thinker, procrastinator, perfectionist.  The first step is admitting there’s a problem.

I’ve been in a class for 8 weeks creating a blog.  I expressed my intention out loud to have the “under construction” message down and the site up by the last day of class. The last day arrived and it was ready to go.

Well, pretty much.  I am still trying to put some color in my headings.  I need to get some more pictures up there, it’s rather impersonal now.  I want to create a subscriber form, that’s important.  I haven’t even begun to work on the SEO issue.  I also need to link it to social media.  There’s also the little matter of my having told virtually no one…

There I was the last day of class.  Our instructor was wrapping up her instruction and asked us if we felt ready to get out there and go live into the digital world.  “Yes!” we all agreed.  I was happily shaking my head along with everyone else.  “Stacy isn’t up yet.” I heard from the end of the row.  I’d been called out by my classmate!  I won’t lie, my first thought was, “Oh crap, I’m busted, I’m going to have to actually do this!”

I had been getting ready to mull it over and ruminate for a good long time. I’d still be over here safely journaling instead of blogging.  I’d have gone on fixing and editing for who knows how long, trying to get it just right.  I was in desperate need of that intervention!

This is what this blog was supposed to be about, the work for my inner critic and my inner censor. There I was ready to squelch myself before I even started.  My grammar and spelling may suck.  I might be doing this all wrong.  My site might be boring.  I might be boring.

I must go back to this: SO!

This experience comes with a huge learning curve for me.  I am going to do it wrong.  People may not be interested.  I want to do it anyway.

So today I told a friend I was doing this, baby steps.  We were running at the time.  It has been dumping rain.  We got to a point where the path was a stream and we had to go around.  I thought to myself, “That IS the path.”  It was wet and wild and messy and muddy and not exactly what I thought it was going to be.  That’s okay if I let it be.